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The Epic Story of Bacon
THIS IS MOCHLUM'S EPIC STORY AND NOT YOURS SO DON'T EDIT OR ELSE I'LL FRY YOUR BRAINS! This story gets more random by the end. Chapter 1: Meap's Been Kidnapped! (at a dark alley, in the middle of a storm) Meap: *walking down the dark alley* Meap (This place gives me the creeps.) *turns at a corner and sees a huge shadow. Meap jumps.* Meap (Oh, it's just a dumster...) Mysterious Voice in Shadows: Or is it? Meap... we've been expecting you. Meap: Meap? (Who's there?) *tries to run away* Mysterious Voice in Shadows: GRAB HIM, GUYS! Guards: *grab Meap and gag him* Mysterious Voice in Shadows: TAKE HIM AWAY! *guards take him away* (noon-time, Suburban Danville) Phineas: Hey Ferb, do you know what we should do today? Ferb: *pulls out a newspaper* Phineas: Reading? *reads over it* OH NO! MEAP'S BEEN KIDNAPPED! Ferb: *nods* Phineas: We got to do something! Ferb: *blink* Phineas: You're right, Ferb. Let's use the emergency friend summoning device that we made. Ferb: *presses button* Buford, Baljeet, and Isabella: *fall from the sky* Hi, Phineas, Hi, Ferb. Phineas: Meap has been kidnapped! Isabella: Oh no, this is horrible! Baljeet: What are we going to do? Buford: I know what we can do! Phineas, Ferb, Isabella, Baljeet: What? Buford: Fried chicken! *pulls out some and eats it* Phineas: Looks like he's useless. Ferb: *presses button that makes Buford fall from a trapdoor* Baljeet: I have an idea, too! Phineas: What? Baljeet: We can report it to law enforcement. Phineas, Ferb, Isabella: *silence* *Ferb presses trapdoor for Baljeet, too.* Isabella: Looks like it's just us three. Phineas: Let's go! Chapter 2: Regular Bacon (at Super-Market) Mordecai: Let's buy some cheese! Rigby: It's not on the list....so yeah, let's buy it! Mordecai: How about bacon? Rigby: BAAAAAAAAAAAAAACON! BACOOOOOOON! BACON BACON BACON! Mordecai: I'll take that as a yes. LET'S BUY ALL OF THE BACON! Rigby: YEEEEAH! Mordecai: *grabs all of the bacon* LET'S GO CHECK OUT! *goes to check out line* Cashier: 2 packs of cheese, and 378 packs of bacon? Rigby: Correct. Cashier: That will be $783. Mordecai and Rigby: O_O Mordecai: (whispers) I guess we have to sacrifice some bacon. Rigby: NO! Let's just have pops pay for it. Mordecai: Okay. We'll pay. Cashier: Good, now GO! Rigby: *grabs bacon and leaves* Mordecai: Look at that newspaper headline! MEAP'S BEEN KIDNAPPED! Rigby: That's bad. Hey, I heard that if you have 378 or more packs of bacon, it will form togethor to make a human-sized bacon that is alive! Mordecai: Really? Then why isn't- *turns around and sees the bacon coming to life* Bacon: Hello, kids. I am bacon. I'm here to save Meap. *jumps to space* Mordecai: Let's help rescue Meap, too. Rigby: OKAY! YEAH! LET'S GET A TEAM! Mordecai: YAY! Chapter 3: Three Teams (Downtown Danville, mid-day) Phineas: The first thing we need is a team. Isabella: We already have us three. Ferb: *blink* (We probably need three more people.) Phineas: Hey, about those guys? *points at Harry Potter, Ronald McDonald, and Larry the Platypus, who are all sitting togethor on a bench* Isabella: Do you guys want to join our rescue party to save Meap? Harry Potter: Sure. Ronald McDonald: Why not? Larry: BLUGUBLUGURGH! Phineas: O_O Harry Potter: We decided that that mean Yes. Phineas: Well let's go, then. (Mordecai and Rigby's house, mid-day) Mordecai: Where are we gonna find help? Rigby: Let's look under the couch cushions. That's were I go when I need to find something. Mordecai: Good idea! Rigby: *looks under couch cushion* Patrick: *under couch* HELLO! Rigby: Hi Patrick. Wanna join our group? Patrick: OKAY! Darth Vader: *still under couch* Join the Darth Side! Rigby: How about joining the Regular Side? Darth Vader: ....nobody asked that I can join their side before...okay, I'll join. Mordecai: Who else is down there? Sonic: *jumps from couch* I'm here. Amy: *jumps out* HELLO SONIC! Sonic: AAAH! *runs away* Amy: COME BACK! *chases him* Rigby: They don't count. E.T.: *jumps out* Phone home. Floating Mario Head: Walkin' on the ground. Rigby: Guess they're the rest. (Deep space, evening) Bacon: I need some help to go on this adventure. I wonder who can help me. Sonic: *Sonic's spaceship flies by* HELP ME! AMY IS TRYING TO KILL ME! Amy: *Amy's spaceship flies after him* SONIC, COME BACK! Bacon: I better save Sonic. *shoots a laser that blows up Amy's ship. Sonic: Thanks, Mr. Bacon. I owe my eternal debt to you. How may I help you? Bacon: You can help me save Meap. Sonic: Okay. ANYTHING FOR KILLING AMY! Bacon: We need more people. Around four more. Sonic: Okay. I have an idea! *presses a button that makes a Complien, Pikachu, Tails, and Finn appear* Finn: Yay, it's ADVENTURE TIME! Complien: Hehe. Pikachu: I am Pik- ACHOO! I wish I didn't have such a cold. Tails: *combing a barbie* I love you bar- I MEAN, MONSTER TRUCKS! Bacon, Sonic, Finn, Complien and Pikachu: O_O Sonic: We know that you like barbies, Tails. Tails: Okay. *pulls out a barbie* Sonic: And that doesn't mean you can play with them, either. Tails: :( ah man. 'All Three Teams' 'Team Phineas: '''Phineas, Ferb, Isabella, Harry Potter, Ronald McDonald, Larry the Platypus '''Team Regular: '''Mordecai, Rigby, Patrick, Darth Vader, E.T., Floating Mario Head '''Team Bacon: '''Bacon, Sonic, Tails, Pikachu, Compliens, Finn Chapter 4: Building a Rocket (Phineas and Ferb's backyard, evening) Phineas: Okay team, we need to build a rocket ship so we can go to space and save Meap! Harry Potter: I can use magic (DA DA DA) to conjure up the parts. Larry: BLOOGUBOOGA Ronald McDonald: *whispering to Phineas* We think that means "Good idea." Harry Potter: Hmm... which spell... oh yeah! *waves his wand* Rocketis Partis Appearis! *causes a mini-explosion* Maybe not the right spell. Isabella: You think? Ronald McDonald: I have an idea! *eats a hamburger* Larry: Yugublumber? Harry Potter: Larry said "How will that help us?". And Harry said "How will that help us?" too. Phineas: So did Phineas. Ferb: And Ferb. Isabella: And Isabella. Ronald McDonald: I haven't said it yet! *finishes his hamburger* My idea is.... IS- Phineas: WHAT? Ronald McDonald: We can build a waffle machine and settle the hunger of the SUPER-HUGE-WAFFLE-EATER who promised me fifteen years ago that if we give him a really big waffle that he would give us rocket parts. Harry Potter: Good idea! Isabella: Where will we get waffles? Larry the Platypus: YUTUPAGINHESE! Harry Potter: That means "I know where to find lots of waffles!" (Mordecai and Rigby's house, evening) Mordecai: So guys, we will need a rocket. E.T.: Who said that he was in space? Rigby: I DID SO SHUT UP! Darth Vader: I sense dark in you. Rigby: Thanks. Floating Mario Head: Momma mia, my pants are on fire! Patrick: YOU DON'T HAVE PANTS! Mordecai: Guys, um, can I have all of your attention please, can I... *sighs angrily* ATTENTION! Patrick, Rigby, Floating Mario Head, E.T. Darth Vader: What? Mordecai: WE NEED ROCKET PARTS! Darth Vader: I ALREADY HAVE ROCKET PARTS! I OWN A ROCKET! Mordecai: Oh. Can you get that ship real quick. Darth Vader: Okay. *walks off to get the rocket* Mordecai: Now back to our regulary scheduled mayhem. Floating Mario Head: MOMMA MIA, MAYHEM! Rigby: ''Pants on the ground, pants on the ground, looking like a fool with my pants on the ground! Patrick: I WUV WU, MAN! *hugs E.T.* E.T.: LET GO OF ME! Mordecai: I love mayhem. Chapter 5: The Fourth Wall's Repair (Deep Space, night) Bacon: We're luckier then the other teams, we have a spaceship already! Complien: What other teams? Pikachu: Yeah! Bacon: I'm the namesake of this story. I probably know about the plot. Sonic: YOU JUST BROKE THR FOURTH WALL! Pikachu: Yeah, and the fourth wall crushed Tails. Sonic: Yaaay... I mean... nooo! Complien: Mr. Bacon... Bacon: Yes? Complien: THE DANG SHIP IS OUTTA BATTERY! Pikachu: I can power it! This looks like a job for Pika- ACHOO! Stupid allergies. Sonic: I can simply run a hamster wheel and fix it! Finn: But we don't have a hamster wheel. Sonic: It's just a story, anything can appear whenever we want! Finn: YOU JUST BROKE THE THIRD WALL! *third wall lands on Sonic* Complien: *runs in with a big hamster wheel* I FOUND A HAMSTER WHEEL BUT IT'S BROKEN!' Bacon: We must lift the third and fourth walls to save Tails and Sonic. Tails can fix the wheel and Sonic can run on it. Pikachu: I can lift it! *tries lifting it* I CAAAAN LIIIIIIIFT IIIIT! *lifts it up a little* Sooooniiiiiic. Geeeeet ooooout. Sonic: Okay. *goes out from the wall.* Pikachu: I muuuuust geeet oooout ooooof theeee waaaaay. Toooooo heeeeavy! Bacon: *mutters* ...weak. I'll help. *lifts the wall as if it's a feather* Pikachu: Thank you for rescueing Pika- ACHOO! Stupid allergies. Bacon: *rescues Tails* Let's power this ship! Tails: Thanks, Bacon. Can you rescue my barbie, too. She's under there. Bacon: *rolls his eyes* No. *drops the wall and crushed the barbie* NOW FIX THE HAMSTER WHEEL! Tails: :,( O-okay. *fixes the hamster wheel* Sonic: *jumps onto hamster wheel* LET'S ROLL! *starts running* Tails: Hey, that was a pun! THAT WAS FUNNY! Finn: SHUT UP! Bacon: Now we're back on track. Chapter 6: The Heist! (SUPER-HUGE-WAFFLE-EATER's palace, night) Phineas: So what's the plan? Harry Potter: We steal the SUPER-HUGE-WAFFLE-EATER's waffles and give them to him before he sees! Isabella: That's illegal! Ronald McDonald: I still liked Jerry's idea better. Ferb: *blink* (I know it was less criminal, but there was no way we could make it into that warehouse without any jars of peanut-butter.) Jerry: ...bulgabunyun.... Harry Potter: Jerry said "It was good idea..." Isabella: We know, we know. Phineas: Quiet guys, we're picking the lock. Ronald McDonald: But we don't have a lock pick. Phineas: No, we have a key, but the vault has no lock, so we're going to put the lock on the door, lock it, unlock, and go in! Isabella, Jerry, Ferb, Ronald McDonald, Harry Potter: O_O Harry Potter: Wouldn't it be easier to just ''open ''the door that wasn't even locked. Ronald McDonald: That takes alway all of the crime suspense! Ferb: *puts lock on door, locks it, unlocks it, and opens it* Isabella: Go Ferb! Phineas, Ferb, Isabella, Ronald McDonald, Harry Potter, Jerry: *walk in and see the waffles* That's alot of waffles / Quefloposis. Footsteps: step, step, step Isabella: Hide, someone's coming! Harry: Uh oh- wait, why were the footsteps wrote down on the script like that? Mochlum: BECAUSE I FEEL LIKE IT! Also, stop breaking the fourth wall! This wiki is running out of extra walls! Harry Potter: Sorry. Jerry: Clumbeebob! Harry Potter: Good idea, Jerry! The fourth wall's disappearance has made us an escape route! Phineas: Good idea! Grab all the waffles you can and RUN! Everyone: *evacuates off the wiki's page through the wall* Mochlum: Hello guys. They evacuated to this page, but will come back. Chapter 7: Team Regular's Regular Ride (deep space, midnight) Mordecai: Darth Vader, does this ship have air conditioning? Darth Vader: NO! Rigby: Radio? Darth Vader: NO! Complien: Air freshener? Darth Vader: NO! E.T.: Cup holders? Darth Vader: NO! Floating Mario Head: Heated seats? Darth Vader: WILL YOU GUYS SHUT UP?! STOP COMPLAINING! And by the way, Floating Mario Head, you don't even need a seat? YOUR FLOATING! Floating Mario Head: I know, but along with walking on the ground, I like sitting on the ground, too. E.T.: Are we there yet? Darth Vader: DO YOU SEE AND EVIL PEOPLES STARSHIP? Mordecai: I need to go to the bathroom! Rigby: Me, too! E.T.: Can I phone home? Floating Mario Head: There's no room to walk on the ground in here. Darth Vader: DO YOU WANT ME TO TURN THIS CAR AROUND? Floating Mario Head, E.T., Mordecai, Rigby, Patrick: NO! Darth Vader: SO SHUT IT! E.T.: ...........are we there yet? Darth Vader: NO- actually, YES! *points at Evil Star Cruiser* Patrick: Ah great, all of the parking spots are full. *points at parking lot* Darth Vader: I can fix that. *shoots a sonic bomb that destroys all ships except theirs* Everyone: OH YEAH! *park at closest spot* Let's go! *get out of car* Chapter 8: Team Bacon's Journey (deep space, midnight) Bacon: We're almost there! Finn: ALMOST ADVENTURE TIME! WOOHOO! Sonic: *still running on hamster wheel* ...geeeetiiiiiing tiiiiireeed... Bacon: KEEP RUNNING! Pikachu: Pika- ACHOO- is ready for the adventure! Compliens: YAAY! Bacon: We're lucky since we have a fast engine- or Sonic -to take us to the Evil Star Cruiser! Tails: So doesn't that make the chapter based on our journey a waist? Bacon: O_O *silence* Compliens: Yes. Yes it does. Chapter 9: Return from Chapter 6 Mochlum: Go back to Chapter 6's end and use the link. BEFORE you read this. (Evil Star Cruiser, morning) Everyone: *jumps out of hole* Phineas: We are back to our page! Isabella: Finally. Harry Potter: And luckily, that hole take us to the star cruiser where Meap is! Ronald McDonald: Don't worry Meap, we're coming! Jerry: Letzamugooo! Harry Potter: He said "Let's go!" and I agree! Everyone: *runs through the halls* Footsteps: step, step, step Ferb: Someone's coming! Ronald McDonald: Why were the steps like that AGAIN! *fourth wall breaks* Isabella: I have an idea! *whispers it to team* Guard: *walks by* I wonder what happened to that wall? *leans in close to it* Everyone: *swing in* TAKE THIS / KUMBLUDOGOB! *kick the guard through the wall to this page then lift the wall* Harry Potter: Ha, now you're trapped in the wall! And luckily, your on a page with a lot of holes! Phineas: Let's go! *run through the halls* Security Camera: *looks at them* Unknown Mysterious Camera Watcher (probably the main villain): *low voice* Bwahaha. Come to me, my prey! Chapter 10: Almost the Climax (Evil Star Cruiser, morning) Mordecai: Guys, come on. We must quiet or else they will SNEAK ATTACK! Everyone but Mordecai: SSSSH! Mordecai: Sorry.' Everyone but Mordecai: SSSSH! Everyone: *sneaks through the halls* Footsteps: step step step Patrick: WE'RE DOOMED! Guard: What the- E.T.: *punches the guard* Guard: What is going- Floating Mario Head: *crushes the guard* Crushin' on the ground, crushin' on the ground. Rigby: You better not shout for help guard. Darth Vader: YOU JUST GAVE HIM AN IDEA, YOU IDIOT! Rigby: At least we didn't tell him about the Floating Mario Head's secret pressure point! Guard: *pressure points Floating Mario Head and pushes him out of the way* HELP! INTRUDERS! Patrick; Get him! Mordecai: MmmmmMMMmmmMMMmmmmMMM! E.T.: You can talk now, MORDECAI! Mordecai: Good, because I was getting tired of- Alarm: INTRUDERS INTRUDERS INTRUDERS! Floating Mario Head: Intruders? Where? Darth Vader: HE MEANS US! Floating Mario Head: Doesn't he mean that guy? *points at a squirrel picking his nose* Hmm, I guess not. Darth Vader: AM I THE ONLY SANE ONE HERE?! Mordecai and Rigby: No, we're the only regular ones here. Everyone else is CRAAAZY! Cages: HAHA! WE CAUGHT YOU! *drops on Team Regular* Patrick: NO WE'RE DOOOOOOMED! Mysterious Voice in Shadows: Yes, yes you are! Chapter 11: The Three Teams United (entrance to Evil Space Cruiser, Morning) Bacon: We're here. Sonic: I've got an awfully good feeling about this! Tails: Why? Sonic: BECAUSE I FEEL LIKE HAVIN' THAT FEELIN' JERK! Tails: Wow. Harsh. Finn: It's finally adventure time! Complien: YIPEE! Pikachu: Watch out villains. You are about to feel the power of Pika-ACHOO! Stupid allergies. Bacon: Let's go, guys. *enters hideout* Alarm: THE INTRUDERS HAVE BEEN CAUGHT! Complien: Either this is a trap, or we are the last ones here. Finn: I hope this is a trap, because it would be emberassing to be here last. Pikachu: Wouldn't it be more embaressing to be the first ones trapped? Sonic: NO! Wow, get smart. Tails: That wasn't nice- Bacon: FOCUS! WE MUST RESCUE- oh look, a squirrel. *touches it and it turns into a machine* Squirrel Alarm: INTRUDERS! INTRUDERS! Finn: Oops. There goes our adventure. Tails: *pulls out his barbie and hugs it* It's okay barbie, it'll be okay- Sonic: SHUT UP TAILS! LET'S NOT LET THEM GET US! LET'S FIGHT! Pikachu: AH, YEAH! Complien: HEHE! YIPEE! Bacon: You're right, Sonic. When the guards get here, we'll be ready to- Cage: *falls over Team Bacon* Hehe. Bacon O_O -fight... Pikachu: Now we're doomed. (Brig of Evil People Starship, mid-morning) Cages: We trapped you, now we're hanging your cages! HA! Team Bacon: Look, it's another team! *points at Team Regular* Team Regular: Look, it's another team! *points at Team Bacon* Mysterious Voice in Shadows: Ah look, almost everyone is togethor. Including MEAP! Meap: *his cages lowers down* MEAP! Mordecai: AHH! CHEESE! Darth Vader: How does that make sense? Rigby: Does a penguin fly? Darth Vader: NO! Mordecai: He has a point. Bacon: We have to do something! Mysterious Voice in Shadows: But we are missing one team. And they should be running in here... right now. Team Phineas: *runs into brig* WE'RE HERE, MEAP! / LUKUNZALQUENZYMOO! Mysterious Voice in Shadows: Just in time. *drops a cage on them and lifts it up* Team Phineas: NOOOOOO! / OOOOOOON! Phineas: Meap, he's here! Ferb: *blink* Isabella: Reveal yourself, villain! Harry Potter: Or else I must use magic to do it! Revealis Yourselfis! *turns Bacon back into a bunch of bacon packs* Pikachu: NO! BACON! Finn: This isn't good. Complien: Look on the upside, we have breakfast! Mysterious Voice in Shadows: Quiet! I will reveal myself...............right................now............... *walks dramaticly out to reveal........TO REVEAL...... Aunt Steve?!* Everyone: AUNT STEVE? / TUMBUCKYO? / MEAP? / *BLINK*? Aunt Steve: Oh boy, you guys know my name! Phineas: Why the heck did you kidnap Meap? Aunt Steve: Oh boy, it's a long story, but I'll tell you. A short time ago in a galaxy close, close away. I wanted to have a SLUMBER PARTY! I invited a tree, a dog, and Meap, but Meap never R.S.V.P.ed. He might've not been available so I went over to him and asked. He said "Meap", and I'm pretty sure that that means "Yes", so I took him, even though he was struggling in excitement. He kept wanting to leave early, but since I don't understand Meap language, I just locked him up! Everyone but Aunt Steve: :O OMG! / TUVEMBO! / MEAP! / *BLINK*! Aunt Steve: Should I free you guys? Everyone: YES! Aunt Steve: Okey dokey. *presses a button that creates a trapdoor out of the cages* Everyone: Thank you. NOW LET'S LEAVE! *everyone runs* Aunt Steve: Come back! Ah man. NOW LET'S DANCE! *starts tap-dancing* Mochlum: Um, the "The End" que is ready any minute now. *two minutes later* Any minute... Harry Potter: I can fix it! The-Endis Appearis! PLOOPY Aunt Steve: That didn't work! I'll just say it. THE END! Category:An Epic Story Of Meap Category:The Epic Story of Meap Category:Meap Category:Regular Show Category:Phineas and Ferb Category:Fanon stuff Category:Harry Potter Category:Sonic Category:The Floating Mario Head Category:E.T. Category:Epik Pages Category:Aliens Category:Pokemon Category:Compliens Category:Barbies Taste Like Plastic Category:Random Works! Category:Waffles Category:The Epic Story of Bacon pages Category:Long Pages Category:Random Works! Category:Mario